10 Years Younger....

This morning the nurse at the doctor's office had to use a pediatric needle on me (will I never outgrow it?) to draw blood because my veins are so tiny and greedy and don't want to oblige any request. She pounded on each arm for a few minutes trying to evoke any signs of life in there and said it was easier to find veins in elderly people who are severely dehydrated than in me. Great.

Then later I was picking up food at a restaurant, and the cashier gave me this look and asked me how old I was. (why? I have no idea--wasn't buying alcohol). When I told her, she shook her head, and was like "No way. You can't be older than sixteen." Sorry to disappoint.

Anyway, this kid's ready for a super weekend! So excited to have friends come over tonight and tomorrow. Yay! Less excited to write final papers. Boo.

These past few weeks have been so, so great--I've gotten to see friends who I rarely see anymore due to distance, and it's been sooo much fun!! (but I suck at Guitar Hero). There's something about old friends who've known you forever and love you for all your crazy weirdness and you love them for theirs that makes life so much more full. Being with them is so comforting and wonderful and goofy. I'm really lucky.

L'Shanah Tovah

May this new year bring love, laughter, and forgiveness easily.

There are always things we can improve in ourselves, and this year I will take this very seriously, as it is bound to be one of self-reflection. . .

I have so many deeply good people in my life. If each of you could only know how much I appreciate and love you, not just for what you've shared with me but who you are as as a human being. And I will continue in my efforts to tell you. A girl can never have too large a collection of thank you cards to send.

I am grateful for it all.

Memory

I was going to say that I've left this recent bout of seriousness and self-reflection behind me, but it lingers still.

I didn't get home til 9 tonight from work . . . LONG day. Sitting on the floor of my office tonight stuffing folders for a presentation, I listened to an old Guster CD (Parachute) that I'd found at the bottom of my CD collection in my car this morning. It's so incredible how putting in this CD instantly floods me with memories of my friend Dave, taken from us far, far too soon. An inexplicable feeling comes over me. What an inspiring friend and human being. He was truly Alive, you know, the kind of person bursting with energy, gusto, and determination in a way that many of us can only wish we were. I was and still am humbled by him and all that he shared and impressed upon me through our friendship as teenagers.

I was just talking to my friend at work the other day about how certain things like smells and sounds can overwhelm us immediately with detailed memories and connections to the past. And here it was, proving true yet again today. I found myself remembering how just a week before the accident, we'd gone to SuperFresh one weeknight, scouted out all the products with expiration dates past due, and piled them into our cart, knowing that per their policy, the store would have to give them to us for free. We were so excited, laughing and goofing off, driving all our loot home and then proudly dumping it all out on my kitchen table. We sat there feasting on a various assortment of yummy (and slightly stale) baked goods, feeling pretty happy with ourselves. Another exciting and perfect night with a good friend. That was the last time I saw him and the last memory I have of him. I only wish I could have held onto it longer.

Sadly, before today I hadn't thought about Dave in a long time, actually. It's amazing that six years have gone by . . . and yet time just keeps pushing on, forcing us to move forward and onward, even if we don't think we're ready, and on toward the crazy, beautiful, unpredictable maze that is our lives.

But listening to his favorite music today, I just wanted to stop. Stop and think of him and all that he was to us. And so I did.
And smiled, of course :)

Squeaky Clean

This picture was snapped of me hard at work. I hate doing laundry. What a freaking chore--it never seems to end.

Pug is built like a linebacker, tall and broad-shouldered. I'm built more like a little chubby ballerina myself (of course minus the graceful element). My long chicken limbs are the source of considerable mockery (particularly from my sister!) at times. My clothes are about 1/3 the size of Pug's (and forget sharing a suitcase with him! I get no space). I can do a week's worth of my laundry in just one load. My husband's laundry pile, however, has me slaving over the washing machine for a whole day. Not even kidding. And, like many men, he claims he can't "do" laundry. It's just too complicated you know, and he'll inevitably mess it up and get yelled at. What a load of crap. For now, it's still my job, but if his clothes should mysteriously turn pink or perhaps slowly start disappearing over the balcony or something, well maybe I'll get myself demoted. Shucks. :)

Finding myself hanging out with my favorite pair of steel and porcelain appliances yet again today, I'm laughing about a time in college when my friend Ali came home from the supermarket happily announcing that she'd bought us some Durex to share. Not expecting condoms, I laughed and thanked her for looking out for my sexual health and protection. She had of course meant Purex, the laundry detergent I like, but had confused the names. So funny. She cracks me up even when she doesn't mean to--she can't get the names of things right, and forget trying to teach her a phrase or a saying because she'll always botch it, haha. I love her!

But I'm slacking. Gotta go fold.

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